Last Sunday at church I was joking with the mom of a particularly cute three year old girl. “You do realize that once she’s of marrying age she’ll no doubt be courted by all four of my boys.”
And that brings us to the last Valentine’s post for 2012 and the most important. One of the things I want to gain from Valentine’s Day is to give my sons some training (hopefully by example) in how women should treated. Let’s look at, in no particular order, what I hope they’ll get in their “skulls full of mush”.
#1 Son, Mommy & Daddy love you, but you are not the center of the universe.
A few years ago I was at a five year old boy’s birthday party. In addition to the presents for the guest of honor, the parents also bought gifts for his three year old sister. Sad. Even on her brother’s birthday this little girl wasn’t encouraged to let someone else have all of the spotlight. Too many kids are encouraged to think they’re the center of the universe. Old School Dads and astronomers everywhere would disagree.
By doing some extra things for Mom on Valentine’s Day, a dad can keep his junior wingmen humble.
#2 The Guy’s Old School Tool kit
Flowers (Each of the boys gave mom a flower), love notes (The boys and I made Valentine cards Saturday morning), candy (Well, that didn’t work out as well. The boys really like chocolate …) and dinner dates alone with Mom (See #1).
Or to put it another way: If I can keep just one guy from buying a gigantic Vermont Teddy Bear I’ll be happy.
Many guys like to grumble about Valentine’s Day. I realize that for most of them this is little more than conversational schtick — a joke they tell amongst other men to get a laugh and to appear as “one of the guys”. While this is harmless humor amongst adults, it’s a bad idea around young kids. Why? Children six years old and younger generally don’t get sarcasm that well. Using it around them sends the wrong message.
A boy should see his dad’s over the top love for Mom as a blueprint for how he should act when he becomes a husband.
A girl should see her dad’s over the top love for Mom as a blueprint for what she should expect, deserve and require from a prospective husband.
If this post has caught you late and unprepared, don’t worry. OSR is here to help. Check out these posts and you’ll do just fine.
Keep it Old School, my friend
The Old Man