1. Illegal fireworks
2. Minor league baseball
3. Staining the deck (Yeah, I know that plastic stuff is great, but show me a plastic tree and I’ll feel better about it.)
5. Polkas at weddings
6. Having an embarrassing level of fondness for a song that 99.99% of people think is moronic
9. The persona & public image of Sam Elliott
10. Knowing that in real life I have no idea what Sam Elliott is like
11. Maple sugarin’. I have friends who tap their maple trees and boil it down to syrup. I tell you what, this stuff is so good it has a street value.
12. The phrase “I tell you what”.
14. Ben Hur.
15. Non-franchise Mexican restaurants
16. Illegal raw milk. Yeah, that’s right. I’m a baaaaaaaad man.
17. Uncle Jim’s habanero pepper mustard. My mother-in-law, mom of the Smokin’ Hot Wife gave me a jar of this the other day. (That’s good mother-in-lawing.) Good stuff with the right amount of habanero bite. It would make a baby cry and probably jack up a Frenchman.
18. Not getting bothered because you just read “jack up a Frenchman”.
19. My Coffee Shop. No, it’s not my coffee shop. It’s “My Coffee Shop”. Despite the pronoun and antecedents issue, if you’re in Southwestern PA, be sure to stop by. It’s a locally owned business run by great people that serve up a great product. If you’re not near Southwestern Pennsylvania, find yourself a locally owned business like it.
20. Making popcorn the right way. Hint: Never involves a microwave.
21. For the hundredth time, carrying a pocketknife or multi-tool.
22. Having a legitimate reason to wear a fez. Now understand, I have yet to find a reason that would work for me, but I haven’t given up hope.
23. Same as #22, just substitute kilt for fez.
24. Judge Andrew Napolitano
Keep It Old School, My Friend
The Old Man